David Cross - It's Not Funny
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Free Music Notes for It's Not Funny
Free Music Review: I owe some apologies because of this CD
Hit: 5 Stars
I listened to this CD for the first time while on the long drive home from work yesterday morning, and I nearly passed out from laughing so hard -- which was kinda dangerous because, you see, I was DRIVING at the time! So it looks like I owe some people some apologies.
Here goes:
I apologize to the family of three in the aqua-green Saturn who had to swerve to avoid hitting me when I temporarily lost control of my car from laughing so hard and drifted into the next lane.
I apologize to the bicyclist in the red shorts and the white and black helmet who rode off the shoulder of the road and into a ditch to avoid being hit by the family of three in the aqua-green Saturn who had to swerve to avoid hitting me when I temporarily lost control of my car from laughing so hard and drifted into the next lane.
I apologize to the Registered Nurse in the black Toyota Camry who was probably late for work yesterday morning because she pulled over to the side of the road to check on the bicyclist in the red shorts and the white and black helmet who rode off the shoulder of the road and into a ditch to avoid being hit by the family of three in the aqua-green Saturn who had to swerve to avoid hitting me when I temporarily lost control of my car from laughing so hard and drifted into the next lane.
I apologize to the gastrointestinal surgery patient who was unable to get his first post-operative dose of pain medication because the Registered Nurse who was supposed to give it to him was late to work because she pulled over to the side of the road to check on the bicyclist in the red shorts and the white and black helmet who rode off the shoulder of the road and into a ditch to avoid being hit by the family of three in the aqua-green Saturn who had to swerve to avoid hitting me when I temporarily lost control of my car from laughing so hard and drifted into the next lane.
So, somewhere in this town, there is a feeble old man with only about one-third of his lower intestines remaining lying in his generally uncomfortable Hill-Rom hospital bed in fairly intense pain wondering why he has not yet received his desired and truly needed 4 milligram IV dose of Morphine Sulfate that by all rights should have been readily available to him were it not for the fact that the Registered Nurse assigned to take care of him this at this time had not yet faxed down to the hospital pharmacy the written Doctor's order for that pain-relieving MSO4 because she was late to work because she pulled over to the side of the road to check on the bicyclist in the red shorts and the white and black helmet who rode off the shoulder of the road and into a ditch to avoid being hit by the family of three in the aqua-green Saturn who had to swerve to avoid hitting me when I temporarily lost control of my car from laughing so hard and drifted into the next lane, thus making it virtually impossible for the hospital pharmacy staff to know that they needed to scramble a pharmacy Tech up to the ICU to refill their floor-stock supply of Morphine Sulfate vials and thereby make it possible for the post-operative gastrointestinal surgery patient to get the relief he needs RIGHT NOW, DAMMIT!
So do you see, David Cross, all the pain and suffering and confusion you cause by being so damn hilarious?!
Maybe YOU owe some apologies too, mister!
Free Music Review: Best thing to happen to comedy since "FRIENDS"
Hit: 5 Stars
Why would David Cross name this cd "It's not funny"? It IS funny! Soooooooo deliciously funny. Now that America's favorite sitcom. Friends, is over, it's time for americans to embrace the good, family friendly ,and above all patriotic, comedy of Mr David Cross.I never watched that Mr Show thing he did, but I loved David's role in "Men in Black II" (my favorite movie of all time!). Plus I saw him in Celebrity Poker Showdown (too bad my hunky Ben Affleck lost). And he was really funny there. He wore a BATH ROBE! And a Yamukah (is that how you spell it?) Jewish people are so funny! Ha ha!!
The bits on the album are really funny. And they prove you don't have to have a potty mouth to make people laugh. In the first track, titled: "Certain Leaders in Government Look or Act like Certain Pop Culture References" he does a HILARIOUS impersonation of George W. Bush as Justin Timberlake. "Cry me a river, Irak!" LOL!!!!! You gotta hear it to believe it!
Track #7 is also hilarious. He talks about his mom, who's chinese/Jewish, and speaks funny! It's sooo great! Dat Phan, you better watch out, cause David Cross just may take away your thunder!!!
My favorite, though, HAS to be track #4. There's nothing funnier than fart jokes!
The cd isn't perfect, though. I was really dissapointed with track #10 - in the live show, he used props (which I'm told is something he frequently does), and it just doesn't translate well into an album. But maybe they'll release "It's Not Funny" as a DVD, and then we'll get to see all those "things to do with used pantyhose" he talks about. Can't wait!
David Cross proves that you don't have to be some "intellectual" to enjoy good comedy. Who cares about what's going on in the world? Just enjoy a good laugh with song parodies, or the proliferation of Starbucks (wich he talks about in track #3. It's soooo true!!!!!!!)while you flip through the TV Guide to see at what time "American Idol" is on. Isn't that what American freedom is all about?
Buy this cd, and hear it while you salute the American flag. It will make you proud to be a part of this great nation that never, ever makes mistakes.
David Cross is a true American. God bless him, and our white troops.
Free Music Review: Great cd, even greater reviews!!
Hit: 5 Stars
Being a huge David Cross fan, I thoroughly enjoyed his cd, which is hilariously insightful, and sometimes just plain hilarious. But I also really enjoyed reading some of the reviews posted on Amazon.com, which keep up with the spirit that is David Cross' comedic style.
If you're at all familiar with David Cross' approach to comedy, it should be OBVIOUS that reviews such as "David Cross will burn in Hell!! , "Where does David Cross get off", and "Big Christian Big Fan" (among others) were written in sarcastic jest by huge David Cross fans. As I read these reviews, I laughed so hard I cried.
Yet some people have apparently missed the point, notably "mayostard", who took offense to a reviewer's claim that Pres. Bush would never lie...even though it was obviously sarcastic (said reviewer wrote that he/she was from "The Great Progressive State of Mississippi" a direct QUOTE from David Cross' cd!)
I could undesrtand some people not "getting it" if they are unacquainted with David Cross, but to claim that you're a fan, and STILL not get that "So, David Cross thinks it's funny to make fun of religion, and our President, one of the smartest, most intelligentest, best smelling presidents we've ever had " is sarcastic (come on!!! best smelling!!!)is just dumb.
So, kudos to all you comedian reviewers. You're what make being a Cross fan so much fun. And to anyone who took what they said seriously: listen to David Cross' cd about 10 times, watch all episodes of Mr Show, and THEN reread the reviews. If you still don't get it, well, may you be forced to listen to Creed cds for all eternity while watching The Simple Life.
Free Music Review: The Title is a Liar!!!!
Hit: 5 Stars
How could someone as fun-loving as David Cross name his latest Komedy Kollection "It's Not Funny"??? Why would he do so? As a long-time fan of Mr. Cross (ever since his days with King Crimson), I came darn close to NOT purchasing this disk. Remember, he named it "It's Not Funny" and David Cross hadn't lied to me....yet. I shan't forgive Li'l Davey - you lied to me!!! I'm going to pray that my Lord doesn't strike you down for being deceptive. I'm sure God will go easy on you - after all, you're providing all of us with laughter...which is a rather precious commodity in these uncertain times. (Don't get me started.) It IS funny - fun and funny for the entire fambly. My seven-year-old (Susie, if you MUST know) loved his bit involving the jackalope trying to teach the kitty-cat how to tie her shoes. Precious, simply precious. (...) Susie's new favorite saying is "I told you not to make knots!!!" You should hear HER say it - you'd laugh until tears were streaming down your face, much like sweat at the donkey-basketball matches at the Veteran's Hospital. But I digress.
David Cross is a treasure. Not a treasure like buried gold medallions in Davey Jones' locker, but a treasure in the tradition of Red Buttons and Danny Kaye. Unlike the potty-mouthed ne'er-do-wells that pass for comedians these days - such as the vulgar Bill Engvall (don't get me started...), Mr. Cross is a breath of fresh air - much like a pep-o-mint life saver!!! (Don't get me started...)
David Cross is aces with this family man - pop the cd in on your next outing to Chuck E Cheese...and get ready to giggle!!! (Don't get me started...)
Free Music Review: I Pledge Allegiance To The Gags on this CD!
Hit: 5 Stars
Four score and six months ago, David Cross brought forth a new CD, and it's going to slay more than just the 50,000 Americans who died at Gettysburg! President Bush will surely make quite an address following this CD, which illuminates his strong values and faith, all while poking fun at his foibles! Many comedians are quite mean when they talk about our Chief Executive (I'll bet they don't have a CD, though!), but David Cross is just an honest southern gentleman. On his CD, which he recorded at a political fudraiser, David Cross (on the CD) explains how, after living the good life in Georgia, he moved to Boston and "Jew" York City, where the liberal agendas and sodomites twisted his mind and made his hair fall out (How many bald people live in the south? None that I know of- and none of them have CDs!)Anyway, David Cross is back in the fold, exposing the evil rock music CDs (he talks about CDs on a CD! Ironic!) that masquerades as entertainment while causing young women to reveal their rear ends like a modern day Mary Magdalene! Shameful. What is especially rewarding about the CD is David's inclusion of a scathing review of his CD from the liberal media. You would think one of their own (Jew) CDs would get a good review, but not this CD! David Cross's CD is gospel, and I for one thank Jesus that he provided us with this CD to play in our CD players. I have the impression that when the end of days hath come, David Cross will rightly take his place at the right hand of God to be judged and cast into hell - but his CD will stay on my heavenly CD rack!